Cultural Revolutionary

I am quite happy with my recent book sales on Amazon.

I have become somewhat disillusioned with E-barf (even though I still sell and occasionally buy on there) because they seem to not be supporting their sellers. But, being the biggest and most popular certainly has it’s advantages when you’re selling something rare or looking for something really specific.

Books sales on Amazon have been steady and easy though. First of all, there is no PayPal crap to deal with. There are no listing fees and your books are listed indefinitely. And, the payment is quick and easy. I am also able to find pretty much any book I want used (thus Compact friendly) on Amazon and they’re usually dirt cheap.

Hooray for options!

I need to get the house spotless. It’s not horrible but it could use a bit of attention. With kids and cats and dog and rat and chickens, it could always use a bit of attention. I know there are lots of other things I “need” to do.

Here’s the truth though… there are finally some things I WANT to do too. I had a couple of months when I was pretty depressed. I won’t get into all of the reasons why on my blog. Truthfully, some of them are way personal. I had good days and if I blogged, it was usually on those days. I really do try to avoid announcing my nagging negativity to the world. I try hard to avoid whining. While I was depressed, I realized that I no longer really have hobbies. That realization likely depressed me even more. People who either don’t know me in “real” life or people who didn’t know me pre-Tony would probably disagree with me. Certainly, I lots of things I am passionate about. I have lots of efforts I volunteer my time to and I have a pretty full life. But some of the things I was passionate about years ago, I really miss.

You see, there was a time in the past that I loved my camera.  That was before Time Framez (a former business that ***technically*** I still own). Granted, Time Framez would have been MUCH more successful had I not been so focused on That Apple Guy (another former business) and getting Tony’s autism diagnosed and therapy started. Just when Time Framez was starting to be successful, life took some crazy spins. And, I realized that I hated taking photos of small children and other grumpy people. I also realized that I couldn’t be everything to everybody and Tony had to become the most important. So, for awhile now, I haven’t touched the camera. I have (well, had until I killed the LCD screen) a point and shoot camera for all of the obligatory kid photos and the DSLR sat in a bag. I pulled it out a few weeks ago and remembered that I used to love photography. I still don’t want to take photos of people’s kids (sorry, Nat, I won’t be helping you anytime soon… LOL!) or even their pets (no more dog magazine shoots for me). But I do want to take some artsy photos of some other stuff. Not for money, just for fun.

There was also a time that I loved to create “things”. I can sew (thanks to my grandmother and mother) like nobody’s business. But I don’t. It’s not because I don’t have the equipment. I have a decent little medium grade machine. It’s because I haven’t had the motivation. That’s changing too. I am going to finish a skirt for Morgan this weekend if it kills me. I have been getting plenty of inspiration from www.craftster.org and admiring the creativity of the members there. Now I want to get off of my butt and create something myself.

I also have A LOT of writing to do. I’m not necessarily talking about blog writing either. I have plenty of other stuff that I should want to write. The motivation for writing comes and goes for me though. I still have my fiction stuff on the back burner. And now there is this new Compact project that I have agreed to spearhead. Originally, I was totally against the idea of a Compact book. But, through the many suggestions of Compacters, I think that we have figured out a way that I would feel good about it. It should be a compilation of the stories of many Compacters and all profits from it should go to charity. I’ve been doing some research for it and it excites me because it could mean a huge monetary contribution to some great charitable causes. So, this is a need and a want.

Lastly, I need a horse… No, I want a horse. Maybe it’s a need and a want. Horses are one of those things that become such a huge part of your life that once you are truly a horse person, you’re always a horse person. Some kids can take riding lessons, or ride a pony at a fair, or learn horsemanship at summer camp and that’s the end of their involvement with equines. Others of us seem to catch some sort of strange virus that we can never quite shake that makes us long for a lifetime of indentured servitude to a large beast with four hooves. While I know that this want may be a little nuts in some ways, I can’t shake my desire for another horse. Heck, I’m not even really supposed to be outside in the sunlight or hot weather (and it’s always hot here). But, I’m nuts. And somewhere there is a horse that needs me. And when you’re having dreams about being at a horse show cleaning stalls and braiding manes, it might be a sign. I’ll figure it out.

I am so excited! Truly excited… no sarcasm involved!

I haven’t been this excited with the nature in my backyard since we discovered that we still have lightening bugs (aka fireflies) here. I had thought that they were basically extinct in Horry County thanks to all of the massive urban sprawl and development.

And now, I have even more real excitement! I just discovered that some nice bats have moved into our backyard. I’m not surprised with the swamp directly behind us that they would find our area highly desirable. Little Bat-ly (I named him) is so cute. I had left the back light on very much by accident and he was catching the bugs that had been attracted to the light. He was so amazingly fast too. He and his family can stay as long as they wish. We’re a very bat friendly household. Bats are great animals and I detest the mosquitoes they eat. It’s a great trade off. I get fun bats and less mosquitoes.

Note to self: Build the bat houses that I’ve had plans to build for YEARS. They need more shelter. Maybe I can get a whole colony to move in and start my own little bat neighborhood. Yes, my neighbors love me (and that was sarcasm).

It’s been that kind of day… no week… The kind of week when all sorts of little menial shit goes wrong.

For instance, I started out the morning WAY too early (4am) with Tony awakened by a nightmare. It only took a few short moments to quell his fears and he was resting peacefully again. But, then I  couldn’t get back to sleep. No way. No how. And, by the time I tried unsuccessfully to sleep, it was almost my normal time to be up anyway. No big deal though. Like someone I used to know always said, I can sleep when I’m dead.

Then I got ready for the day ahead. Somewhere in the process I discovered that one of my good earrings that I wear ALL THE TIME (literally I almost never change them) had fallen out of my ear. I searched high and low to no avail. A couple of years ago I would have been devastated. After all, not only were these particular earrings a gift, they were also too expensive for me to ever replace. And, I loved them. Somehow this morning though, things were different. I wrote the whole thing off. Either I’ll find the missing one or I won’t. Hopefully I will but if I don’t I’ll remember that they were just “things” and that “things” can always be replaced. I’d had them for almost five years and would have loved to have had them forever. But, if that wasn’t meant to be, I will remember enjoying them while I had them.

The guys who have been helping me with yard work for the summer ran over the cord for the pool’s pump yesterday. They tried to splice it but they apparently got that all wrong too and now it will run but keeps tripping the GFCI outlet and the breaker. This morning I discovered that it’s going to be a harder fix than I first suspected. Am I pissed? Sure. But honestly, once again I’m not nearly as angry as I would have been at some times in the past. One way or another, it will get fixed. And, once again, it’s just a “thing”.

Then there is the issue with my car. Remember that I love, love, love my car. Almost three weeks ago I took it in for brake work. It was supposed to be ready that day. Instead, they had a “human error” occur and a lift accident caused some body damage. It was supposed to be fixed within 48 hours. FINALLY, after much persuasion because I would much prefer my car to ANY rental they could provide me with (and the one they gave me is hellaciously nice), it was supposed to be finished last Friday. I arrived at the dealership only to find there were still some problems with the paint job they did in the fix and my license tag was stolen while it was there. Lovely. Yeah, I cussed. A LOT. And I still don’t have my car back. Yes, it’s nice to be driving a brand new luxury rental car. It’s not mine though. Anyway, I am over it now. I yelled. I ranted. I vented about their incompetence. But somehow, I am over being angry about it. Yes, they’ve cost me grief, money, and time. There’s nothing that I can do to change that though. So, I am making a conscious effort to not be angry about the car anymore. It’s supposed to be ready tomorrow. If it is, it is. If not, I’ll live. It’s just a car.

Like I told a close friend today, it’s odd (especially for me) but I am learning not to get angry at all of the little things in life. For years my Dad has told me that I need to “chill out”. And he’s right. I feel much better when I am able to get over sweating the small shit. It all boils down to me feeling overall much happier when I manage to put it all into perspective. While the typical old me would be livid today because of all of the crap that’s been going on for the past week (the examples above aren’t even a tenth of it), the current me is oddly happy. It’s a nice but weird feeling and I have begun to realize that everyone has this sort of crazy stuff happen. What really matters is how we deal with the challenges though, right?

So, I still have a nasty cough. Morgan tells me it’s getting worse but I refuse to believe her. After all, if I chose to believe her, it might mean another trip to the doctor.

My new to me computer arrived yesterday. Yes, refurbs are certainly the way to go. Compact friendly and all! The price couldn’t be beat either. After about 12 hours of transferring crap over and setting up all of the new gadgets that are on this machine, I think I am almost 100% operational. It is a PC. And, yes, I am already missing some of my iApps. But, honestly, I have to admit that there are just as good programs that will do the same things on this machine as there are on the Macs. Sad but true. PC’s have come a long way in the past ten years. Yes, there is a bit of a learning curve for some of the applications when you’re a backwards switcher. But, honestly, it’s minimal. And it will be nice to be able to run some of those programs and such that are PC only (even though I could have run them with Bootcamp). Plus, there is the fact that most everything is still written for PC first and Mac second. For instance, for the years that I have had this blog, I have been using basic HTML everytime I wanted to italicize or bold something. And then I logged in from my new machine. Wouldn’t you know it… PC users have a nice little toolbar instead of knowing HTML. I somehow knew that some of the people I know with Wordpress blogs didn’t know HTML. I also learned that my blog, built on and maintained on a Mac up until now, looks different on a PC- not just in IE but also in Firefox. I should know better than to not be 100% cross-platform compliant but I suppose I had been slack. Mostly fixed now though.

Before anyone asks, I haven’t named my new machine yet. I have some ideas but it hasn’t “spoken to me” and let me know what it would like to be known as. Go ahead and laugh and then read my earlier post about naming stuff. Yes, I am OK with being weird.

The Compact has seen a huge surge in new members thanks to a nice AP article a couple of weeks ago about one of our members that joined in January. While I am VERY excited that all of the new members are joining, I must admit that I do find it somewhat exhausting. Lots of them have obviously never been on a large Yahoo list before. The Compact is up to almost 10,000 members and with that many people, we have TONS of varying opinions. Hopefully the new folks can hold on until they learn the ropes a bit. Some of our older members are great people and fabulous Compacters but they can also come across as harsh at times (myself included). I hope that our newbies can understand that. It would also be nice if some of the newbies would learn to check our years worth or message archives and trim messages. But, alas, I am pretty sure that is asking too much. Now that I am back online, I can get re-involved in some of the conversations. Hopefully. I am now not computer deficient but I am always time deficient.

Summer colds stink. We have had some sort of strange pass around the virus game going on here for months. Lorraine came to visit back in February and brought with her some California germs. A couple of weeks later, Rick came home from Norway with something equally as nasty. The two combined in me to form some sort of superbug that took me several months to get over. In June I was pretty healthy. Yay. And then Rick once again had to go to Norway for a week the beginning of July. He brought us the delightful gift of airplane germs back home with him. Morgan got his cough. Then Tony got it. I thought I would avoid it but, alas, no such luck. The cough started at the beginning of the week for me. Then Tony got picked up a cold from the virus monkeys at his school. By Thursday I was full-blown miserable. Yesterday I choked and sniffled my way through the workday with medicine head. Today I don’t plan to move. At all. Thankfully the kids have had a long week too and will be completely happy to vegetate with me. Hooray for the weekend.

In the words of Toby Keith…

I ain’t as good as I once was
That’s just the cold hard truth

I still throw a few back
Talk a little smack
When I’m feelin’ bulletproof
So don’t double dog dare me now
‘Cause I’d have to call your bluff
I ain’t as good as I once was
But I’m as good once as I ever was

MAY NOT BE GOOD as I once was
But I’m as good once as I ever was

Lorraine and I were talking last night about the propensity that we seem to have for naming inanimate objects. Perhaps is because of the symbiotic relationships that we form with things that serve us or perhaps it hints at some deeper psychological meaning. I’m not quite sure. I do know that the majority of the individuals that I have met who personify things are much more interesting humans than those who don’t.

Lots of people name their cars. People who really love vehicles seem to be the most likely to give them a name. Most owners of VW’s that I know have named their transportation. Some even become known in the online world by the name of their vehicle. I have always waited for a few days after getting a new to me vehicle to name it. After all, just like an adopted cat or dog, it has to make it’s personality known to me before an appropriate name can be given. I, personally, grow very attached to vehicles. I always have. I remember as a child when my parents would get ready to sell or trade a car that it always made me sort of sad. I remember crying when I was REALLY little because they were trading a Chrysler with a moonroof that I particularly liked. I have trouble separating the memories from the object. And I am completely OK with the realization that this sort of thing may not be exactly “normal”.

I also name my computers and pretty much any other gadget or device with a purpose that I have for so long that it becomes a real part of the family. Even things that aren’t named I sometimes form an unnatural attachment to. The attachment is so strong in some cases that it makes it difficult for me to get rid of an item even after it has served it’s purpose and it’s usefulness comes into question. Granted, I am NOT a true hoarder. I am able to throw things away when necessary. But I won’t lie and say that sometimes that purging process doesn’t make me sad. I am sure that what I describe must be a form of some sort of OCD. Once again, I am OK with that.

Thankfully, I don’t get attached to everything. Really, I don’t. But, I have learned a way to make my personification of inanimate objects easier to some degree. I try buy things that last forever. Not only is the the most economically and environmentally sane thing to do, but it also saves me the pain of parting with them. (As an aside I just realized that this is part of the reason why I am so angry with the failure of my current MacBook Leroy… See that post below.) Even when they begin to age or show signs of wear, I treat them with as much kindness as I can afford to. For instance, I haven’t been able to afford to restore my bus yet. But I will someday. And even though Al Mac’ie (the 12″ aluminum Mac PowerBook) is getting old, he is still loved deeply by Morgan. My car gets pretty much whatever she needs ASAP since I depend on her so heavily. And I plan to keep Gretel forever. I want all of those crazy badges that Mercedes gives you for each hundred thousand miles driven lined up across her grill.

So, yeah. Things do matter to me. But not in the same way that they matter to some people. They don’t need to be expensive or new…. Just mine and serving my purposes.

I have seen similar articles and studies in the past. But does it surprise anyone that the United States is #16 on this list? It doesn’t surprise me. Of course, we’re not all the way down by the war torn nations in Africa. Still, I can’t help but believe that maybe some of those Europeans have figured out some important stuff that we arrogant Americans haven’t.

And, yes, I realize that I am posting this on the most American of holidays. Don’t send me hate mail. I am proud to be an American. That is the very reason that I want to work to make this country an even better and happier place.

http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSN0145488820080701?pageNumber=1&virtualBrandChannel=10216

When Apple switched processors and started building their machines with Intel components I was angry. I tried to get on board with the idea that everything would be just as good as before because it was just a hardware change and not an operating system change. But still, I was nervous about the whole deal. I had lots of nasty stuff to say about Intel. The other Mac enthusiasts shunned me because I was so adamant that Apple was making a bad move. I softened my stance a bit after listening to months of how this change was a “good thing”.

After some convincing from someone whose advice I never should have taken, I bought a 17″ MacBook Pro at the very beginning of 07. It came in with issues. SERIOUS ISSUES. In fact, it had so many issues that within a week it was back at Apple. I fought with Apple for a little while (they wanted to repair it and I wanted an entirely new machine). Then the new machines were going to be held up awhile. Anyone who knows me even casually knows that I NEED my computer. At that point I was operating on a 4+ year old PowerBook G4 and it just wasn’t keeping up. I had already given my G5 tower to my brother because, well, I had gotten a new computer and I didn’t think I’d need it. After much ado, I settled on simply getting a nice little black MacBook that I could have delivered overnight. I liked the color. The size was nice and I max’d the RAM out. All was happy in my world. And still, I was trying to believe the Intel BS about how it was “just hardware” and it was great hardware or Apple wouldn’t be allowing it in their machines.

Fast forward a year… Anyone with a Mac knows that you have AppleCare for a year. The AppleCare warranty system has always been great in the past. You can also renew the AppleCare for additional years after your free year is up. I had never done that before. Heck, why would I? After all, I had a history of great machines from Apple with literally no problems year after year after year. That first generation 12″ aluminum PowerBook is still serving Morgan quite nicely. Other than having the latch repaired when it was almost new and replacing the power supply/cord it’s been great (knock on wood). Besides, I was always taught that extended warranties are gambles. Usually they are great for the company and not really good values for the consumer.

So, my AppleCare ran out about 6 months ago. Now I have a MacBook with a dying motherboard. Seriously. A couple of weeks ago it started, without warning, not charging the battery. I did a little research and found that the batteries haven’t been lasting very long on machines that are used everyday for long hours. I bought a new battery and a new charger/power adaptor just in case that was the issue instead of the battery. Goodbye over $200. But, it was a necessary purchase. Literally, I HAVE to have a reliable machine to make money to help support this family. They came in and did absolutely no good. The new battery will charge in other machines. But not mine. The power cord works great (as did my old one apparently).

When I started stomping my feet and almost crying, Rick was prompted to bring out all of his electronic test equipment to help me. Usually, he makes me deal with my own Mac issues. We have a split household. He’s a PC person. But, he’s also an electronics engineering type person and since we must remember that the only difference is the OS, he knew he could tell me what the real issue was/is with some diagnostics. I admit that while I totally understand the software side of things, the actual hardware perplexes me at times. Anyway, it’s the whole damn thing going bad. He explained it all to me and I could explain it all here but I won’t for fear of boring everyone even more than you already are. At first we thought that just the charging component was dead. Nope. Now I know thanks to some other abnormalities that the whole motherboard is jumping ship.

Before anyone e-mails me, yes, I have reset the PMU. It was one of the first things I tried. I did all of the standard crap that I would tell anyone else to do (remember that I was in this business for awhile). And, after all of this, I called Apple. Gone are the nice and helpful English speaking tech support folks that I used to deal with so regularly for clients computers. I wonder if they’ve had to add lots of new staff and teach them how to say no to helping their customers. It certainly seems that way. Maybe that’s what happens when you’ve got thousands more calls because you’re putting out subpar merchandise thanks to “new” hardware. I have read all of the online forums and know that I am not alone in my frustration. I used to be impressed by how you could call Apple and always walk away from the call happy (unlike my previous experiences with HP, Gateway, etc.). Now it seems to me that Apple has gone to the dark side. Planned obsolescence at it’s worst. I guess that most people replace their machines every year or so. I don’t want to. That’s why I bought a Mac.

So… Where does all of this leave me? My beloved Apple has abandoned me with a limping year and a half old MacBook with a ton of info. on it and a machine that I need everyday. Of course, I can clone the hard drive and I have already backed up all of my stuff since I have no idea how long it will last or not last. I can’t afford to replace it right now. But I’m also not sure that I can afford NOT to replace it. I certainly am no longer spouting the praises of Apple because they simply don’t deserve it. Yes, the OS is still FAR superior. But, when it comes down to it, hardware is what makes it all “go”. And if you don’t have adequate components, the rest is useless. I’m not sure what my options are on the PC side and if anyone is using better “stuff” but if they are maybe I will become a backwards switcher. That pains me to say. It really does. But, ultimately, I was right. Intel sucks.